Stop Apologizing for Growing — Even the River Changes Course

 Life has a funny way of pushing us to be something else, someone else. We're told to grow, to improve, to evolve — but only in ways that make others comfortable. The moment we start changing in ways people didn’t expect, suddenly we’re “different.” But here's the truth: the river doesn’t apologize for changing, and neither should you.

Let’s take a moment to really think about that river.

Have you ever sat by a river and watched it move? It flows freely, carving its own path, bending around obstacles, breaking through barriers. Sometimes it's calm and gentle. Sometimes it’s wild and raging. But it always moves. It never stays the same, and yet, no one questions its beauty or its purpose. No one stands beside the river and asks it to go back to how it used to flow.

Why? Because we understand that rivers are meant to change. It’s how they exist. It’s how they thrive. And honestly, so are we.

Growth Isn't a Betrayal

Sometimes, when you start making changes — maybe you set new boundaries, start pursuing your goals, or decide to leave behind relationships or habits that don’t serve you — people will act like you’re doing something wrong. They’ll say you’ve “changed.” And they don’t always mean it as a compliment.

But here’s what they don’t see: you're not betraying anyone. You're just honoring the flow of your life.

You’re not who you were five years ago — and that’s a good thing. Growth isn’t always clean or comfortable. Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it means leaving behind pieces of yourself that no longer fit who you’re becoming. Just like a river carves new paths through rock and dirt, you too have to make space for your future self.

And guess what? You don’t owe anyone an apology for that.

Change Is Natural

In nature, change is constant. Trees shed their leaves. The moon shifts through its phases. Rivers overflow, dry up, and find new ways to keep moving. None of these things apologize for what they’re becoming.

Why then, do we feel guilty for doing the same?

You’re allowed to outgrow relationships.

You’re allowed to change your mind.

You’re allowed to evolve your dreams.

You’re allowed to say, “That version of me doesn’t live here anymore.”

That’s not selfish. That’s being real. And the people who truly care about you — the ones who understand what growth really means — won’t want you to stay the same just to make them feel better.

Don’t Shrink to Fit

Sometimes, we shrink ourselves to fit into spaces that feel familiar. We stay in friendships or jobs or roles that don’t reflect who we are anymore, just because we’re afraid of disappointing others. But that’s like asking a river to stop flowing — to stay still in one place just so the trees around it don’t get uprooted.

You weren’t made to stay still. You weren’t made to keep everyone else comfortable. You were made to move, to learn, to stretch, to become.

Change doesn't mean you're unstable. It means you're alive.

Let Go of the Guilt

It's okay if not everyone understands the changes you're making. It's okay if they miss the “old you.” You might even miss that version of yourself sometimes. That’s normal. Growth often comes with grief — not because you’re doing something wrong, but because you’re saying goodbye to a version of you that helped you survive.

But just like the river doesn’t look back at the bend it just passed, you don’t have to hold onto guilt for becoming someone new.

You don’t need to explain your evolution to everyone. You don’t need to make your transformation palatable. You don’t need to shrink so others can feel tall.

The river doesn’t apologize for changing. It just keeps moving forward — powerful, unapologetic, and alive.

May 21, 2025 Tags : self growth

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